When I think about us

I dont know, its towards the end of the year and so many things have been happening. The people I care about are all having emotional breakdowns. On the phone, you hear their sobs, you want to stop them, but you know you dont have the ability to do so. That feeling sucks, because you know, deep down in your heart, you really really care for them.

How do I do this? I really have no idea.

I now burn all the bad things that has happened in 2010. Leave them here, and start anew. We will all do you proud in 2011, because we know that you'll be up there looking down on us feeling proud for what we have achieved. :)

The truth hurts ♥

The truth hurts, so we lie. How fun, you say. Haha, I think not.

Lies kill. Lying is a sin.

Sometimes, things appear to be beautiful. Just like fairytales. So you may say, you live in fantasy and what not. I appear to have lived it. Once, for 9 months. Those were times, I would never forget. Really, and from then on, I was afraid. I held in my thoughts, I covered the wounds. It was a big thing when I was awaken from my fantasy, because it wasnt kept a secret. Everybody was talking about it. It was something, we had to explain and tell and cry over and over again. I couldnt accept the fact, it was hard. BUT it was reality. And so we woke up and never tried to connect our fantasy again.

Then again, I trapped myself into another whole new fairytale. Not a different chapter but a whole new story. It was very much harder than the previous one. It was a whole new level. It was something that hasnt happened in a long time or rather, never before. I felt different. I start of a new day and end the day with smiles and always thinking of how much better this could be as the day passes. I thank God for even making this happen. God has done wonderful things. Until the truth was revealed. Its like the climax of my part of this fairytale. I dont know what to do now. It seems like, its raining heavily partnered by thunderstorms and lightning dashing loudly and scarily. How hard is it to even not get out of this. but, its tough. Its very hard. Its like Im trapped in this, I do know how to get this over and done with, but yet Im trying to stop the rain.

Oh God, please help me.

I feel my heart skip a beat ♥

Yes I really do. I dont like how people come around me life and just leave without telling me, and then they finally tell me when they are already at the other face of the earth. Because really, I dont think it's very necessary. If you would know that I cannot stand not having you with me, then why bother even being so close to me in the first place.

I really dont know what to say to you, but I know, in the first place, youre somebody that I would remember in a long time. Somebody I would tell my children and grandchildren in the future. because you inspired and coloured my life.

Bye, ladybug. :')

When I stat to think ♥

When I think of something. I take a long time. I'll consider, then re-consider, them sometimes think of the consequences. I really dont like putting myself into thinking mode, just in case I get emotional. I dont know, but some decisions are really hard to make. Sometimes I really hope that my parents will sit down and listen to my side of the story, because I want to make that decision. Im a big girl, I want to do what's in store for me in the future, with the things I want to do. BUT no, they think Im too young; they think I cannot make BIG decisions, because this decision now, affects my future.

They always think theyre right, I held it in. I always did. I would do things to please them. Getting the grades they want, saving money for tuition, doing extra chores of what they dont notice of, participating in international competitions to make them proud etc. because I love them.

Until today, I feel so spoon-fed. I mean, really? Why must they make a decision for me that will affect my future? I dont know what to do. I really need to learn to overcome the subjects I detest, clear all my doubts and start getting back on track.

2011, I pray that this year, would be one of the best years. A year that I would remember, just like 2010. :D

Bugsies ♥

I dont know. Today was some weird day. I got to meet this guy, 16 of age, but seriously, I thought he was 12. Dexter. I wouldnt say youre awesome because you know that you already are. Pffts. I dont want to blog about you. >:)

Dinner at uncle Chew's place, was awesome. There was this gay dude, that I would remember. He's so funny. Talk about hand actions lah. Hahaha. :)

Bye.

Silver, golden and red Balls ♥

Christmas Dinner in Hilton with Jordan teaching me how to be fat. :(

Blessed Jolly Christmas, friends. :)

Suddenly, it was Christmas. It was so sudden. Really, then I come to remember of putting up the Christmas decorations with Joseph, Makarious, Justin and Jude. It was so fun, I remember our lion joke, the "WHO DOES HUEI MINN LIKE" game, and see whose skin is thicker game.

Anyway, since today was christmas and a few of us involved in the production had to reach church at supposedly 4am, but I haggled my time till 5am. Finally reached the latest, before Luke at 5.45am. Whoops. :)

Lighting crew and stuff was awesome. Really. Then we had lunch over at Uncle Allen's. Got home and chilled then off to dinner at Hilton. I like how the train go choo choo and the little children chase after them.

Bye.

Colourful Swirls ♥

Christmas eve. How nice. You spend your time with your loved ones. I, on the other hand, spent my morning with 2 fairly awesome guys. Namely, JJ and Ean. Jealous much? I even have my side of proof, what about you? (:

Everybody is busy. Especially my brother, rushing in and out from church along with his new church buddies. Im so jealous. No, really. I am. :)

Candy canes are scary. Theyre canes that you can hit people with. Tim Koh is getting me a bundle. Shucks, this better be good. :P

Till Christmas, my neighbours are all having their fellowship. Its going to be a crazy night, with beautiful fireworks. I like the red and purple one. Just not the green and yellow ones. (:

When your eyes were wide open ♥

I come to know of things.

Things about me being the oldest, but Im still always the shortest. Oh cheer up Hueiminn, theyre just too tall. :)

Hello;

PMR results were announced today. I had pressuring friends that came to busybody up everything. Namely, Justin, Rachel, Shanice, Jackson and Benjamin. They made me cry. ):

So anyway, results were to be announced at 10am. Knowing I couldnt sleep last night, I obviously overslept even though my phone was blasting merry music. cough. So, mummy decided to rush to school. See, she was way more excited/scared than I was. We all had butterflies in our stomachs.

We were reaching school, and then I started crying, in the car. I was too scared. Its not funny, because I know alot of you did too. Nicely knowing, some awesome dude had his car beside me taking pictures of my crying. Good lah you. :)

We were late for school but nobody got their results yet. So, we waited. Started crying, pushing everybody to stand in front because we were too scared. It wasnt the best feeling, at all. Mathews announced the percentage of straight As and all that. Knowing we had really high percentages, as students, we panicked, even MORE. Straight A's = 158/180 students. Seriously? Scare the shit out of me.

Today was a good day. I feel so blessed. I really thank God for what Ive achieved and really, all the glory goes to God, because I know, without him, being one of the straight A's students? Seriously? That would be pretty much impossible. really. Im not smart, at all. Hahah. Congratulations to you people, as well. :)

and to all who prayed for me as well. Luke, Darren and I will still never forget how nicely Isaac prayed for me. Super prayer message, ftw! :)

Christmas shopping with Joe and Bran after that was awesome. Today was an awesome day. :)

When we aint falling apart ♥

Mentari teaser buddies. :)

Hello;

Today was an awesome day. Woke up late, so knowing my brother has GTCI, I had to rush through everything. It was my fault, and we only got to know, we were... the earliest, and well, way before time. Way the go, Gid. :)

So, while roaming around, we bumped into familiar faces. Dylan and ZhuEn. And we all know, ZhuEn will walk up to me telling me.. "Oh huei minn, nice weather". So, ZEE. ;)

GTCI was awesome only until I got to know that, I had to impromptu-ed what I was going to say, because they decided to interview me as well. It was hard because, well. I didnt go for my projects. Only once. Yeah, very irresponsible but I had my reasons. So does, Darren, Justin, and Luke. :)

We had church at night when my lighting buddies were being very sarcastic. It was awesome. I liked how, we ended only at 11.30pm and receiving 7 miss calls from Brandon, just only because he wanted to say...

"Huei Minn, all the best for tomorrow. Big day tomorrow! We laser tag if you dont get straight As."

-My gay bestfriend, Brandon Teoh. :)

Shizzz, this reminds me...

PMR results it tomorrow. Im crying myself to sleep tonight, with fear, cold and anxiousness. No, Im actually very excited. I believe in faith. hahah. :)

I got you ♥

Hello;

PMR results are going to be out this week. My GA(s) of both years are busy with church and migrating themselves into Aussie. Crap, I feel so insecure. They were my GAs for a reason? Please lah.

BYE. ;)

Jolly Christmas everyone!